Of course he has a reason to give up. All things considered, Eduardo should be walking away right about now, should have done so a long time ago, and there isn't any good reason why Mark shouldn't know that. He's acknowledged that he shouldn't have diluted the shares, yeah, but he was also there that day, knows what a big deal it was; the near contradiction would leave Eduardo reeling if he weren't so fucking tired, worn out from a relatively short conversation with someone he used to know so well. Mark has always been exhausting, but it's nothing compared to this, the extra strain of trying to bridge the gap between them weighing heavily on Eduardo's shoulders, when he's already felt a good decade or two older than he is since the day he showed up in this place, fresh from Mark's betrayal. What he needs is that burger and a beer and some light conversation, but his own needs have a tendency to fall below other people's, specifically Mark's, in order of importance, and right now, doing what he can to fix this (a job which shouldn't even be his in the first place, though that's nothing new, too) takes precedence over his own feelings. He can deal with it later, go back to his hut and collapse, tell his girlfriend about all this and then probably sleep through an entire day or something. For now, like falling back into some probably sick pattern, it's Mark he wants to look out for, and he feels a little ill for it.
"Just because I would have a reason to doesn't mean I want to, Mark," he points out, voice not much above a murmur. His free hand lifts, resting against Mark's back, what would have been nothing but natural when they were at Harvard, but now feels strangely forced. It's something. When he can't even reason to himself what drew him to Mark initially, what made him stay friends despite everything, this is the best he's got; he just hopes it counts for something. He hasn't gotten a real apology, but at least Mark seems to want him around. It's all he's really wanted, more than the company or the money or any of the rest of it, so much so that seeing Mark worked up now — and Eduardo knows him well enough to recognize the signs, the tight sound of his voice, the shaking — actually hurts, like he's the one who caused it. (He should have every right to, but he isn't like that, isn't so vindictive. He stormed out of the office with every intention of taking everything, but petty revenge isn't his style; he doesn't aim to make Mark feel bad.)
There are explanations he still wants to give, mouth opening like he means to try, but there just aren't any words. How the fuck does he explain what makes a person become friends with someone else, anyway? It should be the less consequential part, the why mattering less than the fact that he is. At a loss, he shakes his head. "The place isn't too much farther. We'll get those burgers, and you can... catch me up on how things have been, other than the whole settlement thing."
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Date: 2011-05-20 05:34 am (UTC)"Just because I would have a reason to doesn't mean I want to, Mark," he points out, voice not much above a murmur. His free hand lifts, resting against Mark's back, what would have been nothing but natural when they were at Harvard, but now feels strangely forced. It's something. When he can't even reason to himself what drew him to Mark initially, what made him stay friends despite everything, this is the best he's got; he just hopes it counts for something. He hasn't gotten a real apology, but at least Mark seems to want him around. It's all he's really wanted, more than the company or the money or any of the rest of it, so much so that seeing Mark worked up now — and Eduardo knows him well enough to recognize the signs, the tight sound of his voice, the shaking — actually hurts, like he's the one who caused it. (He should have every right to, but he isn't like that, isn't so vindictive. He stormed out of the office with every intention of taking everything, but petty revenge isn't his style; he doesn't aim to make Mark feel bad.)
There are explanations he still wants to give, mouth opening like he means to try, but there just aren't any words. How the fuck does he explain what makes a person become friends with someone else, anyway? It should be the less consequential part, the why mattering less than the fact that he is. At a loss, he shakes his head. "The place isn't too much farther. We'll get those burgers, and you can... catch me up on how things have been, other than the whole settlement thing."